Anna Karenina

I went to see my movie tonight.  I am claiming rights only because I spent several months and 850 pages reading it.  It was lovely.  Everything I could have hoped for, but watching it made me realize that it wasn't the "story" that held my attention during the months I spent reading the book.  It was the psychological and spiritual insights.

For example, the first line of the book is:

'Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.'

I could think on this one line for ages.  It is so insightful and so utterly true.

And then there is the psychology of Anna.  I think the movie treated it very well, but the most powerful part of her downward spiral has to be read, because somewhere in her thoughts, you start recognizing your own voice in her irrationality which makes her tragic ending all the more shocking.

Lastly, I love the transformation of Levin.  I wish I could carry his final insights around with me like a pocket Bible.  Below is just a small passage from the end of the book which I think is Tolstoy's main point.  This is part of Levin's epiphany:

Then, for the first time, grasping that for every man, and
himself too, there was nothing in store but suffering, death, and
forgetfulness, he had made up his mind that life was impossible
like that, and that he must either interpret life so that it
would not present itself to him as the evil jest of some devil,
or shoot himself.

But he had not done either, but had gone on living, thinking, and
feeling, and had even at that very time married, and had had many
joys and had been happy, when he was not thinking of the meaning
of his life.

What did this mean?  It meant that he had been living rightly,
but thinking wrongly.

He had lived (without being aware of it) on those spiritual
truths that he had sucked in with his mother's milk, but he had
thought, not merely without recognition of these truths, but
studiously ignoring them.

Now it was clear to him that he could only live by virtue of the
beliefs in which he had been brought up.

"What should I have been, and how should I have spent my life, if
I had not had these beliefs, if I had not known that I must live
for God and not for my own desires?  I should have robbed and
lied and killed.  Nothing of what makes the chief happiness of my
life would have existed for me."  And with the utmost stretch of
imagination he could not conceive the brutal creature he would
have been himself, if he had not known what he was living for.

"I looked for an answer to my question.  And thought could not
give an answer to my question--it is incommensurable with my
question.  The answer has been given me by life itself, in my
knowledge of what is right and what is wrong.  And that knowledge
I did not arrive at in any way, it was given to me as to all
men, _given_, because I could not have got it from anywhere.'

So much good stuff!  I got this from Project Gutenberg online.  Daniel went to see it with me and he was wishing he understood the story better.  They director was so creative with the scenes so they could fit all 850 pages into 2 hours, but if you haven't read the book, it's easy to get confused.  I suggest reading the cliffnotes or something before watching.  Also, the R rating is for a little gore that couldn't be avoided in the storyline.

For Education's Sake

At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I have to give a shout out to going to college.  In our consumer-obsessed society, too many of us enter college with the aim of making more money when we graduate.  But it turns out, college is insistent that you learn stuff (awesome stuff) and those that don't have a fire for learning burn out.  But what if we were more passionate?  What if we went to college without all that pressure to state a major with a high salary connected to it.  Then we wouldn't just fall in line with our parents' world, the one where the job types are already prescribed and we are destined to think we are destroying our environment and the Democrat/Republican split personality is a natural way of thinking.  I hope my generation will stop thinking about dollar signs and start getting curious about the way the world works.

A few book reccomendations...

My Women's American history class has been very illuminating, and has especially made me grateful for the position of equality with men I hold in modern society.  Some of the books that we have read include Charlotte Temple, by Susanna Rowson.  This book has been around since the 1790's so you feel like you're getting right to the source of women's 18th century thoughts.  I also have been reading No Small Courage, by Nancy Cott, which has essentially "caught me up" on women's American history.  (Many of my classmates are History majors so I was feeling a little behind.)  Cott is extremely thorough and explores the lives of all groups: European, African and Native American.

I will say though, that I have thought about women's "progress" and I have found pieces of it to be damaging to both sexes.  Women now have the burden of child-bearing and have lost the option to stay at home and take care of their children without risking poverty.  Men tread a fine line between being expected to provide for a wife an family and being accused of male-chauvinism and patriarchy.  It seems as though a new kind of partnership with equally shared roles of providing financial stability and childcare is the only way for a modern couple to survive today's demands on family happiness.

Battle of the Sexes

College football Saturday means I do a lot of reading, playing piano, and avoiding turning on the TV.  I just want to make sure all the boys know that we don't force them to watch runway shows or gilmore girls, so be a man...go to the game or go to a sports bar.

And to all the girls that pretend to like watching sports on television...you can go to the game too.

Homes are not for whistles or cheering crowds, so just buy a ticket!! Have a real experience.

Daniel is awesome about not watching sports when I am around.  Sports on TV wouldn't be so maddening except that there is no girlie equivalent.  We never get to say, "Sorry honey, the fashion shows are on for eight hours today so I am just going to sit here all day on the couch except for when I see something I really like.  Then I am going to jump up and down and scream and act like the TV can hear me.  Oh...and can you get me another cosmo?  Runway shows make me thirsty and incapacitated at the same time."

Here's the Skinny

I am apprehensive about creating another post about reading but I had to tell you about a book on my shelf that gets more use than any of the others.  It's called French Women Don't Get Fat by Mireille Guilano.

A few years ago, I stumbled upon this book at Borders in Salt Lake City in one of those sections you know you shouldn't be in if you want to keep any shred of self-esteem for the rest of the day.  But the title intrigued me so I bought it anyway and I haven't been able to part with it since.

It helped me stop running and start walking more (which has made me thinner than I ever have been).

It taught me to how to turn eating into a pleasurable hobby, from the shopping and cooking all the way to the first (and by the way the most enjoyable) bite.

I just like the common-sense of it all.  Basically it is a "How to" on living in your own skin.  I couldn't be more grateful for it because I used to go to extremes with running and exercising, eating salads every other meal, and weighing myself.  I haven't been on a scale for at least a year because this book taught me how to gauge my weight by how I feel and how my clothes fit.  I know my clothes fit and feel the same as they did last year so I am at the same weight!

Everyone's different, but this book is the basis for my staying-slim-philosophy.

A Vain Perspective

Today I caught up on my favorite fashion addiction -  Project Runway.  I can't believe it has already been four episodes!  Every season it feels like it passes by way too quickly.  Joanna Coles, Editor-In-Chief for Marie Claire was a guest judge on the show and she said two things that I hope will stick with me.  She said, "That's the point of fashion.  It's transformative." and "Clothes are emotional.  When you put them on, they make you feel something and they make other people feel something when they see you in them."



I loved this.  Sometimes I chastise myself for fussing so much over how I look and what I'm wearing, but sometimes the clothes I put on in the morning truly do dictate how I feel throughout the day.  Maybe I could start seeing my perceived vanity as a form of reverence.

A Fashion Philosophy

Pearl earrings can be worn with anything and to anywhere
A good strapless bra solves quite a few wardrobe dilemmas
Black skinny jeans are a must
Cute shoes are worthless when you have to walk in the rain
No one remembers what you wore but they will remember how you smiled