Transitional Summer

     In the past, summer has meant job hunting.  Being the introspective introvert that I am, I would typically spend the springtime reevaluating my life, decide that my current job was not aligning with my goals, put my two weeks in, and then spend the summer looking for a job.  Granted, sometimes the change in employment was due to a change in school schedule or graduation.
     This summer is different, yet strangely similar.  I tend to put enormous pressure on myself...pressure to achieve, to be my personal best.  The way I have handled jumping into teaching is no different.  I didn't know I wanted to be a teacher.  I wanted to be an actuary..i.e. I wanted to attain the crown jewel, the holy grail of being a math major.  It was the job that said, "Wow you're really smart, you must make a ton of money."  Then I started taking the actuary exams and stressed myself out, studying for them alongside my senior year classes.  And when I stress, I draw inward.  I began talking to Daniel about what our future family life would look like, and through those talks, the teacher image emerged.
     Upon moving here, employment was key, but also getting on the teacher track.  I found both in being employed as a substitute teacher.  Substituting is good for me.  It is more money than I have ever made and the pressure is over when the last bell rings.  But where am I going with this?...oh yeah, this summer.
     I am stressed again, but slowly unwinding myself.  I started WGU April 1st, and since then I have been on the fast track.  It's a "competency-based" program, which lets me go at my own pace, which in my world means hyper-speed.  The average student completes the program in 18 months.  I was determined to complete it in 12 months, the main motive being to start student teaching in Jan. '14, vs. Sept. '14 (I only have those two options each year), so that I could get a teaching contract for the '14-'15 school year.
     This summer, I was planning to complete most of my program.  I have done a whole lot since I started.  In fact, I am on track to graduate in March '14.  But my aggressive plan means studying for 3 major math exams this summer, and this task has left me paralyzed.  I have reached that point of overworking myself, and have spent the last three days watching TLC and reading psychology books.
     So I am rethinking.  A teaching contract is getting less and less attractive at this stage in my life.  I really enjoy substituting, and I especially love the flexibility.  Daniel's career requires mobility at this stage, and I can substitute anywhere.  I'm not giving up on getting my credential, just considering slowing the pace.

Summer and Family Matters

Summer is here!  Today was the last day of school for most of my district and yesterday was my last day of subbing for the year.  Yesterday I watched the first 45 minutes of A Bug's Life 5 times.  I don't recommend it!  Now that summer is on, I can get to work on completing my teaching credential.  I love working on school from home.  I have a schedule for my day and it's so amazing to get chores and errands done and transition right into writing a paper, without having to work out bus schedules or deadlines.  Loving WGU.

We spent the weekend visiting family in Salt Lake City and sending Taylor off on his mission.  I spent the 10.5 hour drive home thinking on the weekend and reflecting on family.  So often we hear the phrase "Life is too short" but when it comes to family, life is long, especially when you have a big family like I do.

What does that mean and what are the implications?  Think back on the history of your family.  It stretches further than you can think about and someday we'll all be great-great-grandma/pa who did such-and-such. Think about your aunts, uncles, grandparents and how much they have affected your personality, well-being, and experiences.  That's what I mean.  Family life is long, and its effect is far-reaching.  Too often, families can lose perspective and get caught up in short-term situations, losing sight of the long-term effects.

I write the next part of my post, not placing any blame, or making judgments.  Truthfully, it's hard seeing my family these days.  Several factors contribute to this fact, including that several of us live out of state.  I would like to propose some solutions that might remedy our future family relationships.

1. Once in awhile, at least every year or two, we all need to be at the same place at the same time.  We need to set a date in the future that we can all commit to being there. (Taylor's Homecoming? Palm Desert resort weekend?)  Being in the same city doesn't count.  I mean everyone is off-work and attending at least most of the time.

2.  We need to have an itinerary.  If we could all spend all of the meals of only one weekend together, that would be amazing, inexpensive, and doable for everyone's schedule.  Meals need to be planned and everyone contributes.

I was a little heart broken after this weekend.  We spent a lot of time in our hotel room, or walking the downtown streets because we didn't have enough of an itinerary.  We heard about people being here or there, but often two parties invited us at the same times and we felt conflicted turning someone down to see another family member.

I almost didn't write this post.  I am so nervous about offending, but this comes from a place that misses my family so much.  Hopefully we can find a way to get over past issues and create a together family again.

On a much, much lighter note, here are some of my favorite pictures from this weekend.

Adam taking care of sippy cups.

Sweet Adeline

Flashback!  Love this picture that my mom found.  1991?

Daniel's turn at taking care of sippy cups.

Tea Party Crashers

The Last of Summer Reading

I finished Life of Pi this afternoon on the plane so I am prepared to give it a proper review.  I whined and complained about how the "Robinson Crusoe"-esqe adventure story just seemed to drag on forever, but the last twenty pages changed everything.  It's one of those books that I would not necessarily recommend unless one is willing to brave 400 pages to experience the reward at the end, but if you do decide to read it, hang in there!

My new book, These is my Words by Nancy Turner, was a recommendation from my cousin who is a literature major.  I have also heard excellent reviews from others so I am excited to dive into this one.



Other than a new book, life is about to settle into normality around here as nannying starts an Wednesday, and the first day of school is only three weeks away.

Labor Day Weekend in Hanford

We are back from another memorable trip to Hanford, California!  The whole family was there except one sister-in-law who had to stay back to take care of a loved one, and all-in-all it was a wonderful weekend.  We surprised Daniel's family since he didn't get the time off from work until the last minute.  We were glad that we didn't miss it because it was a good time for me to get to know the new additions to my family better especially my soon-to-be sisters-in-law.

Here are a few pictures from the Portland-Fresno plane ride.  We were able to see some of the wildfires which were creating a haze around Mt. Hood.

                         

Here are some of the donkos playing in Grandma's backyard...

Some of the highlights were taking engagement and family photos, a much needed return trip to superior dairy for chocolate chip ice cream, and more silliness than one girl can handle.  I love being a part of the Kahn family.

I know this post is already overwhelmed with airplane photos, but I couldn't resist some aerial views of Portland on our return flight today.

Oregon Zoo

Last night there was a picnic at the Oregon Zoo for Westin employees.  It was my first time to the zoo since I moved to Portland two years ago.  The Westin was where Daniel and I met so it was fun to tell close friends about our engagement.  I hope to get back to the zoo because we only had an hour to walk around.

So it has begun...

I'm not good without a focus.  When I was five years old I got the chickenpox and I drove my mom crazy until she finally got some homework from my kindergarten teacher.  I'm happiest when I am busy, and I am definitely not busy right now.

Today was the first day that Daniel was back at work and I am off from school.  I have tried to make the most of it, but it has been kinda miserable.  Although I tried to be prepared by buying a copy of Kathryn Stockett's The Help, today was still a jedi mind battle between me and the refrigerator.

I went on a walk this evening to try and clear my mind and come up with ways to survive the next six weeks until school starts.  So far I don't have any bright ideas except to keep doing something, anything, even if it means I go on ten walks a day.  I just can't fall into the trap of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself.

P.S> At least I'm reading something other than calculus textbooks again.  I am already 200 pages into The Help and it is wonderful...highly recommended.  It raises the bar for my next reading choice though so I hope it's not too hard to find the next read.

Lazy Sunday Walk

Today Daniel and I went for a walk to Laurelhurst Park.  It's only about a 20 minute walk from our apartment.  We walk a lot in the summer.  I think we feel so pent up when its raining that we try to squeeze out as much sun-time as possible.