Getting in the Holiday Spirit

Daniel is coming home tonight (Yay!), sorry...can't contain it.  Last year we got a Christmas tree and we are planning on going out on Friday night to get one and I am so excited.  It doesn't feel very holidayish around here yet so I lit a candle and turned on Nat King Cole to get the season going!

I love Christmas.  I love wrapping presents and getting so excited for everyone to get their gifts.  I love Christmas music (I don't think Daniel does...but he'll get used to it.)  I am excited to get into some of my Christmas piano music.  Confession to my mom...I have one of your copies of "Were you There".  (I hope not your only one!)  I just can't do a Christmas without it.  I really miss hearing my mom and her siblings sing it so I play it to give myself a little piece of home.  I am missing that song "Still, still, still" though so I will have to see if I can find it in a store or online.

I'll post a picture of my tree when I get it up. :)  Happy Holidays!  December 1 tomorrow!!  Remember when Christmas Day just wouldn't get here fast enough?  The older I get the more time flies because there is so much more to be responsible for!!

Fam...Check out Bigarade Beet Farm and post holiday memories!

Pushing the Reset Button

Hello from Seattle!  I am spending the day glued to this desk working on a paper about Maria W. Stewart, (America's First Black Woman Political Writer according to my textbook), but my view could be worse so no real complaints.

Lately I have felt caught up in a storm of trying to carve out my life until it settles like a puzzle piece into the complexity of extended family relationships, complicated ideologies and life as a woman.  But today I am pushing the reset button.  I have spent a lot of effort, time, and money trying to be the "good girlfriend", the "good sister", the "good future in-law", but I am ready to be a little selfish for awhile.  I'm just ready to spend money on clothes instead of plane tickets, and to enjoy this time in my life.  I have felt so rushed, but there is no real rush.  Today there is just a view of Seattle, a conversation with a magnificent historical character, and some room service.

P.S> This is not to say my recent efforts to spend time with family was not well spent...it's just good to recognize when it's time to slow it down.

A New Hobby

I have been troubled lately by my lack of settledness here in Portland which has become ever more apparent with Daniel away.  We have become dependent on one another (which is not a bad thing), but it has left us, me especially, with a noticeable absence of company when one of us is gone.  I wrote recently about my desire for a real friend (click here for a refresher), but I have come to the realization that there has been no effort on my part to gain the ready society of others.  Part of my solo status stems from my previous method of gaining friends by going to church.  Now I must invent a new strategy.

I want to combine my love of cooking with my love of paper crafting into a new hobby: I want to entertain.   Already I have two dinner parties and their guest lists in mind, one for Christmas and the other for the new year.  I think I have been in a rut of thinking that my life hasn't started yet, that one has to be married and/or have children to participate in the "good life".  So often Daniel and I find ourselves going over to other people's houses but we rarely (basically never) have people over to our apartment.

I am going to start with a some ideas from the current issue of Cooking Light and go from there.  I will keep you posted on my party planning schemes and maybe it will inspire you to get your party on!



Happy Turkey week!  And give Columbus and the Pilgrims a break this year...they really did mean well.

Seattle

Going to Seattle next week and I am so excited!  It's been awhile since I've been there, and i can't wait to get back.













Definitely a salmon sandwich in my near future!

Gender Mobility

I find myself thinking about motherhood a lot.  Slow down....thinking, not actualizing.  It makes me tired.  I am tired now, as I have been struggling to balance going to school and earning money, so I can't imagine trying to juggle family and a career.  It's hard to be patient, especially when there are so many girls younger than me that have started their families.  But children are expensive and I'm not ready for that bill yet.

Thinking of motherhood also make me think about mobility, about who belongs where, and who can move about without restraint.  Women are still in a bind.  All of the 'social' constraints may be gone that kept women out of the workforce, but its not really fair yet. (I mean the decent wage-earning workforce.  It should be clarified that women have a history of being medial wage-earners.)  This is not an academic research paper on gender equality.  I have a real knot-in-my-stomach about my future as a woman.  Here are some of the scenarios that run through my head.

1) My future as an actuary...Trying to study for the qualifying exams will make my bachelor's degree look like learning phonics.  It will take me years of ladder-climbing, competing with men who don't have to take maternity leave or have a human being grow inside them and then become completely dependent on their bodies, but still get to enjoy having a family.

2) Yesterday I saw a story on the need for dentists in this country.  This is a career I have seriously considered before.  I would have the flexibility to work 3 days a week and the income to pay for childcare.  Plus, I could run my own office instead of dealing with dopey male-chauvinists as colleagues.  But it means 1 yr.+ of prerequisites, then 4 more years of school.  No problem!  I would do it in a heartbeat if I was a man.  But I am 25, and waaayyy past my family-starting age already (by my upbringing's standards), and waiting 5 years to have a baby seems crazy.

There...I have spilled my maternal guts to you.  I'm sure I will make good decisions as I start my life.  My biggest concern is that I remember that while babies are cute, eventually they become people, and I want them to have the best start possible.  I just hope I can find a career that facilitates my dualism, that both my career will make me a more fit mother, and that my motherhood will make me more fit for the workforce.

Orange Glow

Tonight as I was walking to the bus stop after a long day of class/study, I had another chance to fall in love with this city.  I am so happy that the mayor and the police decided to take back the public spaces that were occupied.  They may have thought that the city belonged to them, but it really belongs to me, and to all the other taxpayers that realize that change is possible within a working system.  We don't have to tear down the house to fix a leak.

Gift of Music

How could we exist without music?  Good music is a way to feel free from time for just a moment, and free from all the structures that we've built around time.  I say that sometimes I get lost in the sadness, when I notice the temporal nature of this thing called life.  But a rhythm, a pattern, a song, a genuine laugh, a child, and yes, of course even sometimes a beautiful calculus theory, can lift me out.  I don't hold the secret to happiness...only I think it must be cultivated and sustained.  We have to seek it out.

Philosophy aside, here are some of my "happiness songs" that are forming a base for the wedding playlist.  I think I have the folk music bug.

Also, I went on the most amazing walk today.  This picture doesn't do it justice but autumn is the most amazing time of year (except that it means winter is closer).

Guinness Beef Stew

A cooking post!  I like to only post my tried-and-true recipes on here.  This one came from Cooking Light, but I have altered it a little, so here's my version.  Plus, this stew is so soothing for a sore throat on a cold day.

Guinness Beef Stew

8 teaspoons olive oil, divided

2 cups chopped onion

1 tsp. dried thyme

1 tsp. dried rosemary

3 Tbsp. all-purpose flour

1 1/2 lbs. beef stew meat

3/4 tsp. salt, divided

3/4 tsp. pepper, divided

2 cups Guinness stout or beef broth

1 Tbsp. tomato paste

3 cups beef broth

1 bay leaf

3 peeled, cubed Yukon gold potatoes

2 peeled, sliced carrots

2 peeled, cubed turnips

1 Tbsp. Dijon mustard

parsley

1. Heat a large dutch oven over medium-high heat.  Add 2 tsp. oil to pan; swirl to coat.  Add onion, thyme and rosemary; saute for 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Warning!  Step 1 will make your kitchen smell so good it will be hard to wait for dinner.

2. Place onion in a slow-cooker.  Place flour in a shallow dish.  Sprinkle beef evenly with 1/2 tsp. salt and 1/2 tsp. pepper.  Dredge lamb in flour, and shake off excess.











3. Return pan to medium-high heat.  Add 1 Tbsp. oil to pan; swirl to coat.  Add half of beef mixture to pan; saute to brown on all sides.  Add browned beef to onion mixture.  Repeat the procedure with remaining beef and 1 Tbsp. oil.










4. Add beer (or broth) to pan to loosened browned bits.  Cook until reduced to 1 cup (about 5 minutes).












5. Add reduced beer or broth to onion and beef mixture in slow-cooker.  Stir in tomato paste, 3 cups of beef broth, and bay leaf.  Cook on high for 1 hour.











6.  Add vegetables and cook for another 3 hours, or until meat and vegetables are tender.













7.  Stir in remaining 1/4 tsp. salt and 1/4 tsp. pepper, and dijon mustard.  Ladle into bowls and sprinkle with parsley.  Enjoy!

A few book reccomendations...

My Women's American history class has been very illuminating, and has especially made me grateful for the position of equality with men I hold in modern society.  Some of the books that we have read include Charlotte Temple, by Susanna Rowson.  This book has been around since the 1790's so you feel like you're getting right to the source of women's 18th century thoughts.  I also have been reading No Small Courage, by Nancy Cott, which has essentially "caught me up" on women's American history.  (Many of my classmates are History majors so I was feeling a little behind.)  Cott is extremely thorough and explores the lives of all groups: European, African and Native American.

I will say though, that I have thought about women's "progress" and I have found pieces of it to be damaging to both sexes.  Women now have the burden of child-bearing and have lost the option to stay at home and take care of their children without risking poverty.  Men tread a fine line between being expected to provide for a wife an family and being accused of male-chauvinism and patriarchy.  It seems as though a new kind of partnership with equally shared roles of providing financial stability and childcare is the only way for a modern couple to survive today's demands on family happiness.

I Love Stay Home Days

I have been sick (again!) this week, and now I am taking amoxicillin for an ear and throat infection.  I can't say it hasn't been nice to stay at home cuddled up on my couch.  I have been doing more homework than cuddling so it hasn't been completely unproductive.  I can't wait until I actually do something so my blog will stop being so lame.

Trick-or-Treat!

Smell my feet!

I got to go trick-or-treating last night with three ninjas, a power ranger and a princess.  I felt a little guilty having that much fun because I know the parent's of one ninja and power ranger were sad to have to miss it.  One's kids are only little so long!!  But I had the time of my life. (And it didn't rain!)  A blue sky never goes unappreciated around here.