In the past, summer has meant job hunting. Being the introspective introvert that I am, I would typically spend the springtime reevaluating my life, decide that my current job was not aligning with my goals, put my two weeks in, and then spend the summer looking for a job. Granted, sometimes the change in employment was due to a change in school schedule or graduation.
This summer is different, yet strangely similar. I tend to put enormous pressure on myself...pressure to achieve, to be my personal best. The way I have handled jumping into teaching is no different. I didn't know I wanted to be a teacher. I wanted to be an actuary..i.e. I wanted to attain the crown jewel, the holy grail of being a math major. It was the job that said, "Wow you're really smart, you must make a ton of money." Then I started taking the actuary exams and stressed myself out, studying for them alongside my senior year classes. And when I stress, I draw inward. I began talking to Daniel about what our future family life would look like, and through those talks, the teacher image emerged.
Upon moving here, employment was key, but also getting on the teacher track. I found both in being employed as a substitute teacher. Substituting is good for me. It is more money than I have ever made and the pressure is over when the last bell rings. But where am I going with this?...oh yeah, this summer.
I am stressed again, but slowly unwinding myself. I started WGU April 1st, and since then I have been on the fast track. It's a "competency-based" program, which lets me go at my own pace, which in my world means hyper-speed. The average student completes the program in 18 months. I was determined to complete it in 12 months, the main motive being to start student teaching in Jan. '14, vs. Sept. '14 (I only have those two options each year), so that I could get a teaching contract for the '14-'15 school year.
This summer, I was planning to complete most of my program. I have done a whole lot since I started. In fact, I am on track to graduate in March '14. But my aggressive plan means studying for 3 major math exams this summer, and this task has left me paralyzed. I have reached that point of overworking myself, and have spent the last three days watching TLC and reading psychology books.
So I am rethinking. A teaching contract is getting less and less attractive at this stage in my life. I really enjoy substituting, and I especially love the flexibility. Daniel's career requires mobility at this stage, and I can substitute anywhere. I'm not giving up on getting my credential, just considering slowing the pace.
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